part 2

27/10/08
Now I’m writing in the dark, after seeing you last night again. We were at the lake and it was different this time, after all the things we have said. I asked you about your brothers ex, and the rumours, and you denied everything. I was so relived, I knew you’d admit it to me if you had. But now I can believe you not quite so blindly. We walked again, in the dark. And I kept my hands in my pockets, not because they were cold, but because the temptation to hold your hand, snake my arm around your waist and up your back, to touch your neck, your cheek with my cool fingertips, to pull you in; the temptation was too big. This time we sat by the dam on a bench. We could hear the water lapping against the boats, ducks swimming across the surface, but we couldn’t penetrate the night to see. In spite of this I could feel your eyes on me, feeling out my shadowy silhouette in the dark. I said I was cold on purpose, and you hugged me. I smelt you, not the smell of aftershave or bodywash, but you. The smell of your body, roll-ups, your car and probably oil, and it smelt nothing like I expected it too.